What do we have here?
Somewhere on his way to the grand stage of life, Kuja raided the theater closet and salvage whatever he could. Ugly black knee-high mage boots with golden laces? Check. A white flowery shirt that’s too long at the wrists? Check. Cod piece? Check. Wait. What? Why? Why in God’s name would anyone wear just a cod piece?
It’s like someone stole his pants, and he has to find something to wear quickly. So he ran into the gym and rushed out with the first thing that could conceal his tail. That’s part of the reason why the codpiece is so big. Still not satisfied, he rummaged through the locker room and found purple shoulder pads from the football team. They matched nothing. So he put tassels on the ends and they still matched nothing. Only the gold tied this disaster together, and even that forced the design.
Embarrassed by his exposed buttcheeks, he ripped parts of white shirt and wore it as a skirt. This left a mid-drift just under his nipples, making him look like an cheerleader mocking a football player. Two feathers completed the outfit, which made his hair look like the tail end of a turkey.
A man wore this. But the fashion was so feminine, everyone believed he was a girl. At first glance, his codpiece looked like a thong. As he walked to the stage, everyone male in the audience felt funny at the confusing sight. Why was there such a bulge? Why is he so pale, and why is he wearing clothing that competes with his skin tone? Is it really necessary to expose so much leg, bringing attention to what’s in between them?
Make no mistake. Kuja is wearing what he feels. Trash. Exit stage left, you human garbage.